There came a point, as it does for everyone at least once in their life where I was burnt out. I was teaching so many hours in a studio/gym environment that I personally could no longer stand staying an extra hour to get in my own workout. I'm sure many a teacher has been warned, especially when going through teacher training..."You love your Pilates practice now? You're excited about getting in hours of personal workouts to learn the equipment and master your craft? Just you wait...there will come a day where you will teach the method more and are barely able to get in your personal practice." I know I was warned this early on and didn't believe it for a second. I told myself I am disciplined. I will always practice what I preach. Yet that day still came.
In a way I felt I lost faith in the Method. I needed to clear my head from all the years of classical vs. traditional teaching debates. The years of working in so many different places that I lost track of why I took up Pilates in the first place. How it made me feel internally strong and beautiful. It allowed me to be an acrobat, boxer, swimmer, gymnast, equestrian, yogi and dancer. Pilates took me to a different world where there were less restrictions on my body and I was able to defy gravity if only be it in the 100 for a matter of 60 seconds worth.
How did I unstuck myself and get back in the studio on my own terms? Basically I had to unearth the joy I had experienced in my first few sessions. Doing that I had to find a mentor. That mentor oddly came from an Ashtanga Yoga class and she had no idea until months later how her cues and explanation of yoga allowed me to once again return to the studio and begin again with Footwork.
Part of me had to find my mind and set it right again for my body to be able to accept the connection again. I had to feel my breath in new ways. I had to hold a Boat pose to realize how much it resembled a Teaser. I had to do a full Handstand to recognize how Joseph Pilates was intelligent enough to use the Ladder Barrel to provide assistance to the average "Joe".
I was again allowed to move in a way that provided the body balance. The dance of yin and yang. The twists and side bends. The full Sun Salutation to rinse the body. I was told to root down, yet find a way to soften in each pose. I felt comfort in the knowledge I was only one pose away from meditation or Child's pose. Once there all I had to do was breathe until I was able to begin again.
Suddenly Footwork had layers. It wasn't a silly, quick warm up to get to the juicy parts of Pilates. Footwork became that time where I was able to check in with my clients bodies and notice all those subtle hints. To remind them to breathe and why we breathe. We cleanse and detox the body with proper breath. We purify the blood through the breath. We get every vessel and nerve woken up prior to doing the 100 so we see more success later in the practice.
During my group classes I began to educate more and bring back my love of the Method to my students. I could get all nerdy with some anatomy terms, have them close their eyes to feel the proper way to hold their pelvis steady while under tension and check in to their mind/body connections. I also began to teach less exercises and focus on the details that make Pilates so valuable. All those little ways we use posture or lessons on how to pick up a box and put it down with proper control.
My wish for you is there may never come a time when you feel you need to escape from the Pilates world. However, if that day comes know that sometimes it takes another teacher/mentor to help you begin again. All is takes is one single breath and the mental choice to start over. To make yourself a priority. Perhaps that is the whole reason it is called a practice?
